Tag Archives: loneliness

Sad Pants

12 Jul

When I am home alone, I might be am paranoid.  I probably would be fine if it weren’t for the dogs barking at thoughts in their head noises.  I think the dogs feel extra protective of me when the husband leaves.  So being a rationale human, I realize the dogs are over-reacting go to the knife drawer.   I am not sure I could actually stab anyone, but it makes me feel like I have some kind of protection.  When I lived alone in the previous house, I had a K-bar that was never far from my side.  I miss that knife.

That reminds me, we never went to the local gun shop.  It’s a “landmark”, really.  Everyone in this state knows the place and most people in this state don’t know the city I worked in.  To me that means it is probably worth checking out.

Anyway, I digress.

This will be the first time we’ve been apart this long since we started dating.  And it’s only 8 days.  It’s going to be a long 8 days.  I am grateful that we’re just PCSing and he’s not deploying, but I still miss him [more than I thought I would].  I guess his absence highlights how isolated we are here.  How our friends are so dispersed.  When we move to the next duty station, it will be different in that respect.  People will be closer.  We will have time to see them.  It will be nice.

But it still breaks my heart to leave here.  Our first house.  This wonderful city.  Our wonderful friends, who may not be close, but are “local” to this area.  Everything.  Even welcome change is hard.

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